The #1 myth in divorce cases.

By Elizabeth Billies

It is not about alimony or who gets to keep the house. Rather, the #1 myth that I am asked about from my divorce clients is: what age do the children have to be to get to decide which parent they live with? Is it 12? 14? 

Spoiler alert. There isn’t one. Under the Pennsylvania Custody Statutes, while the “well-reasoned preference of a child” is a consideration for the judge when determining a custody schedule, there is no age when a child gets to be the final decision maker on where they live and who they live with. That decision only comes when they turn 18 and are considered a full-fledged adult, well, at least in the eyes of the law anyways. 

This makes sense. Think about it. Is it actually a good idea for a 14-year-old to get to decide who they want to live with?  How would they make that decision? Would they base it on which parent buys them a Playstation, lets them eat chocolate for breakfast and/or play Fortnite until 2am? Maybe. Would such a living arrangement be in their best interests? Probably not. 

This is why children do not get to be the sole decision makers of their custodial schedules. This is not to say that a child’s thoughts, activity schedule, and special needs shouldn’t be taken into consideration. In fact, if you’re involved in custody litigation, it is important for you to share these concerns/realities with your attorney so that they help you craft a proposed custody agreement factoring in these areas as well as present your case in the best possible way if you go to court. 

Are you involved in a custody matter and need help deciding on a custody arrangement for you and your children or presenting your case to a judge? Please contact the family law lawyers of Dischell Bartle and Dooley to see if they can help you.